I’ve been kicked off a bunch of weight loss “support” message boards. My crime? I offer advice. I get specific. Somebody says they have a problem; I try to present a solution. And that has gotten me not just flamed but blocked from a handful of “support” web sites.
I generally refer to most weight loss “support” boards as cheerleading and sympathy. Someone posts that they are so upset, they don’t know why they’re not losing weight or they’re angry at themselves for falling off their diet. They are inundated with well-intentioned “Hugz” and “I’m so sorry for you, honey, we’ve all been there,” and of course the obligatory prediction of the future, “You’ll get through it! You can do it!”
Call me pragmatic. When I see a problem, I want to try to fix it. If you’re a good friend of mine, I might let you cry on my shoulder very briefly but then I want to get down to doing whatever I can to fix your problem and relieve your pain.
It’s natural to want to feel sorry for ourselves when the going gets rough. But I believe we relieve the anxiety and stress when we take a deep breath and assess the situation realistically and in practical terms. Stop fighting reality and embrace it! Formulate a plan. Nothing’s ever hopeless as long as you identify your options and know what you’re going to do next.
When it comes to weight loss, we’re notorious for doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Endless diets, exercise drudgery, weight regain—it’s a vicious cycle! It’s been difficult to find a fresh perspective because, frankly, so much of what’s out there is about motivation and inspiration and yes, platitudes, cheerleading, and sympathy.
I’ve had many people tell me they thought I’d “motivate and inspire” people with my book. But I don’t want to do that and it’s not what I intended for my book to be. I’d feel humbled and privileged to be a mentor, to guide. I offer a plan. Hopefully, that fresh perspective you’ve needed to break the cycle of failure. Want a shoulder to cry on? OK, you can cry on mine but I’ll be proposing ideas for what needs to be done!
Has the struggle with weight loss made you feel like you’ve just GOT to make a BIG change? And this time, it HAS to WORK??!!! Have you wondered if there’s some other way you haven’t tried or have you blamed yourself? I hope you’ll consider reading my book.